Here I am, writing at dawn, while the world is sound asleep, deep in slumbers.
I hardly have sleeping problems. I just keep waking up too often.
Tonight again, as usual, I woke up amidst a dream.
A sudden impulse made me not get back into bed
but take out my diary from the bedside table and pick up the pen and begin writing.
So, here I am, half-awake, rubbing my eyes, perched on the window-sill, writing at dawn.
It is 4:00 am. 4:13 to be precise.
And I wonder if it means anything.
Being a horror movie buff, I remember 3:00 am is a peculiar time
in the night when paranormal activities are known to occur, or so is believed.
So I know, it’s only me and the slow ticking of the clock
that I should expect. Nothing disturbing.
Looking out the window, I feel, the night is quite like any other night.
A typical winter night. Quiet. Deserted. Cold. Starless stretch of sky.
Through my window, I see only a vast expanse of towering buildings and
shadowed black blocks that mean tight-shut windows.
And I wish for the umpteenth time
if I could rather be facing a sea or a wide-spread garden.
One of the many reasons I hate modernization.
Gazing in the far distance,
I see radiant colored lights appearing hazy from the window panes
that I think are perhaps, the Christmas decorations.
It renders such an appealing look and I almost cannot take my eyes off it.
Almost immediately a thought crosses my mind.
Why do we shut the windows at night?
There is so much more out there that calls for our attention.
Somewhere inside my mind,
a voice answers – from fear of robbery, from cold,
for many so reasons.
I have never liked shutting down window panes or pulling curtains at night.
Why barricade the beauty of the night from entering your world?
But then the point also is that do we really have the time to sit back and think on this,
to look out at the sky and bask in its enormity?
Aren’t we the busiest of souls on the planet?
And what about me? Of all these years, I think about it only this night.
With the festive season just around the corner, there is soaring
tranquility in the air which is otherwise missing.
The steady wind and the chillness in the atmosphere nothing but
adds to the beauty of the night.
The wind tickles me in the exposed areas of my neck and in the
hollow of my ears which are left uncovered by my loose hair.
There’s something sickly sweet about the chillness of the wintry night
settling on the bare skin of my hands and face.
I can’t avoid but feel something magical about the solitude nature of the night
which is so quiet yet alluring, encompassing all and everything.
Somewhere far away I hear dogs howling, an argument of sorts (rather barks) follows.
The constant bark-commotion draws closer.
It feels mighty unpleasant about the stillness of the night being thus disturbed.
I can’t see the padfoots from where I am seated.
Suddenly, Alfey joins me trying to peer out on the street and all at once ready to growl if need be.
Just then, a biker speeds past them, enjoying the quarantine road devoid of person or pollution.
It is all hushed up again.
I enjoy the furry feel of Alfey’s presence while I rub below his ears.
He peers into the darkness.
Unlike me, he not once does blink his eye. And I think.
What does he see? What does he feel?
Does he know what it feels like to be thus enticed by the calmest face of nature that is night?
Does he also feel what I feel at this moment – my heart and mind enveloped by the immense peace?
Does he also see the picture that I so ardently paint through words and that would remain
in my memories for long yet to come?
What is he thinking when he glances at me, what thought does occupy his mind?
Perhaps, I may never know.
Except that both our hearts are in sync with the moment,
passing through the same set of feelings.
He slowly puts his head in my lap and drifts to sleep.
In the distance,
the midnight hues slowly change to the shades of faint amber.
It’s past five now. Almost dawn.
Soon, the first streaks of sunlight will burst in the sky.
I rehearse the upcoming day in my mind.
A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens is going to occupy most part of it.
I feel excited. Oh! For how long have I wanted to read that book!
I wish I was a painter and could arrest this moment in oils.
But instead, I capture the passing minutes in words while I sit writing at dawn.
And before I take leave,
there’s someone here who would like to wish you a belated Merry Christmas
and hopes you all had a splendid time.
Well, better late than never, right?
I like to write anytime but best time seems to be night time when there is less distraction and because I work nights . What is the best time for you to write?
By reading your words, I could actually peer over your shoulder and see the crack of dawn. What if you are not a painter, you are a writer. There is hardly a difference. Great emotions, Asha.
Best wishes to you and Alfey for 2014!
Hey Russel, Alfey says thanks a tonne that you stopped here. 😛
Thank you for sharing this article quite interesting and, hopefully true happiness rays began to warm our hearts, when we can share it with sincerity. Greetings from Gede Prama 🙂
Greetings to you too, dear Prama.
reading.. I just went back 20 yrs.. nights of Kolkata and a curly haired guy walking on the roads with street dogs – 2 AM..
We are taught to run – race – win.. and slowly forgetting to sit down – peer and ponder.. on another thought – do u ever dream in sequences? u know.. one part first.. then a break in sleep and dream.. sleep again and then resume the dream and its story?
Yes, I do. And in most cases, it gets me frustrated if I end up waking amidst a dream and I do not resume it. Such dreams seem more real since they sort of, keep recurring.
Missed your musings, …
To you too, Bert. Hows the new year been so far??
… chunks of time, undivided by society, but broken up by my private mind …
… trends …
food: business seems to go to a break-even this year — 2012 was a disaster and 2013 a rebuilt nearly from scratch …
family: both daughters studying well / 81y.o. father still does crazy things, but in a quiet period / relationship is in an upward movement
happiness: … there is awe and silence often, except during the weekends …
Perhaps you didn’t want such an elaborate answer, and just wanted to read ‘OK’ 🙂
On the contrary, I love when people go beyond writing just a simple Hi or Okay or Thank you. Seems a lot vague to me.
This was perfect.
how have you been doing … ?
Except for hoping for winter’s to never end, nothing much really. On a serious note, struggling to fix a key that has fallen apart on my laptop. 😛
We had no winter worth mentioning — car window has only been frozen 5 times in the past 3 months.
for that key … you might need a looking glass and a tiny pincer/plier … and a lot of patience
With no winter, it can get tough. And well, did I mention I am hardly patient?? 😛
A Christmas Carol, a wonderful book I know you will love. Your thoughts and writings are always a source of fascination to me. You have a very romantic way of looking at things. I now wish I COULD stay up all night so I could perhaps experience some of your thoughts.
The night is beautiful but I would recommend at least shutting the curtains whilst you’re changing, just in case!
Hey J. Yes, Christmas Carol was fun. I re-read it as soon as I finished it.
I guess, every now and then, a writer likes to take their writing down the romantic lane, if nothing, then just to keep going. Can we escape?
And yeah, you SHOULD stay up all night with you, if only to read me your fav book or verse. I’d love that.
I might take up your idea of shutting curtains under described conditions, oh. yes!! 😛
My reading out loud is rubbish, I do try and have gotten better but still not much good at it…favourite book it take weeks to get it down to a handful. Perhaps one day I will stay up and read some DIckens out loud, as he liked to do.
Glad you reread A Christmas Carol twice in a row, it’s just so festive and fun. If I got undressed with the curtains open the neighbours would come together to buy me a set so they could lead normal lives again lol.
Beautiful writing. So well expressed that I felt I was right there with you looking out the window. Mesmerizing.. I wish we could let those windows remain open too.. always.
P.S. Alfey’s really cute.
Yes, I’d have loved to have you with me, Pragya. Would be great to add another feather to the nightly cap. Or perhaps, only to shift Alfey’s head in your lap. It starts to feel heavy after a while, you see. 😛
Asha, many a night I wake up a two as if prodded by our creator to share! And what I write seems to inspire many…you are being blessed to share your thoughts with us! Happy holidays!
Thank you, Wendell. I am still to hit your post on random musings. Im sure its going to fun reading them. How’ve you been?
I love these midnight deliberations of yours, Asha. It has been quite a while since I have come to your beautiful space here but this was really good. I really loved the way you portrayed and accounted your emotions and thoughts… I’m a horror film buff too but I only watch them when I cant sleep. 😛
It took quite a while for me to return to your comment here and I am happy, however, you did stop by.
As for horror movies, glad that makes us two, Manu.
Lets plan a movie together then, what say?? 😛
And, yes, I love when I am in one of those analysing moods. Only they come by real meagre lately.
Next time I’m in your town let’s go for a horro movie in 3D and see which one of us would actually survive.. 😛
Yeah, your ‘analysing’ posts have become rare these days but like they say… ‘the rare it gets the better it comes’ 😀
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